With joy, I sit down and write another name in the Book of Life. Even before her name was written here, I have been writing her story...
I began writing in her mother's womb. I wrote pages filled with love and joy at her birth and as she grew. I wrote as she persisted through academic triumphs and athletic fails. I wrote as she made new friends - some who would last, some who would leave, some who would draw her to me, and some who would push her further away. I wrote with joy as she said that simple prayer asking me to be in her life and with even more joy when she finally understood what that meant and began seeking me closely.
I wrote with tears when her father died. I grieved with her as she pushed me away and hardened her heart because of the pain. Although she tried to hide, I did not leave. I continued to write. I wrote with more sadness as her mom fought cancer, but I knew through these trials her family would grow stronger and seek me. Though she questioned my reasons for this part of the story and was often filled with anger and fear, I stayed by her side and continued to write.
I wrote with deep intimacy and love those moments when she sensed my presence, my leading, and my love. I wrote with healing as she sought me, faced her grief, and pressed on even when it was hard.
I wrote with excitement when she went to college with a heart to serve me no matter what and no matter where. This openness allowed me to write new opportunities, new relationships, more healing, and more growth. As she sought me, I continued to guide. I continued to write as she went to grad school, pursued her dreams and followed me overseas.
After graduation, I did not write what she wanted, but I wrote what she needed. I allowed her to seek love and experience pain. Although she tried to ignore me at times, I continued to write. I grieved with her when she lost part of herself, but my love never stopped. Even when her choices made me sad, I did not stop loving her nor leave her side, because that is what love is - walking with someone through the joys and the pains. In the depths of these pains, she cried out to me and I continued to write.
I wrote in years of healing, of learning to serve faithfully in the everyday, of teaching her how to trust again. I gave her a community where she experienced the love of my family. Although she sometimes wondered why this waiting was a part of her story, I continued to write, because I saw the bigger picture.
I wrote with anticipation and happiness as she fell in love with someone that encouraged her to follow me. I wrote with joy as they were wed and experienced true, fulfilling love. Now I am writing their story together, but I am also continuing to write hers.
I wrote with patience as I asked her to step out of her comfort zone, leave her community, and seek me in an environment she never imagined. I continue to write step by step, day by day as she seeks to follow me. I know there are questions. I know there are doubts, but I am still writing.
I know she wants to know what the next chapter holds, but she will know in time. Just as she didn't understand why she her story was filled with pain and or why she was stuck in one location as she longed to be in another, I knew. I was writing. And with time those parts of her story become more clear. In just the same way, I will make the present uncertainties clear in time.
Although I am still writing, I know each chapter that lies ahead. There will be joys and sorrows, but through them all, I will never leave her side. Even if she pushes me away again, I will continue to write.
This is how I write everyone's story. Whether or not someone's name is written in the Book of Life, I know and I am writing their story. I long for everyone's name to be written there, but I also give freedom to choose. But once they choose me, I will never leave their side. The exciting thing is that those who choose to walk with me in life know the end of the story. There is no fear in death, because when their days on earth come to an end, they will join me in everlasting life.
And so it is with her. As I continue to write her story, she may not know what the next chapter brings, but she knows what the final pages will read: "Well done, my good and faithful servant." With this she can walk forward with confidence and faith, persevering as I walk by her side and continue to write.
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